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-- Poem : Torrent (https://www.jusunlee.com/forums/showthread.php?threadid=15570)


Posted by MellowYellow on 03-11-2004 05:02 AM:

Poem : Torrent

Torrent

I never thought the rain would fall
So hard upon my head.
All heaving clouds will only call
The one that is not dead.

Despite it all I stand here now:
The rain does not reveal
How it could never come to bow,
But dying clouds will kneel.

When all the noise and pain has ceased
Blood stopped in open veins.
A rain has taken all my heart:
Then nothing now remains.

----------------------------
Assignment was to write a poem in common meter: abab,abab,abab rhyming. 4 quatrains (12 lines). iambic or trochaic (sp?)

You're supposed to be able to sing it to : Amazing Grace, America the Beautiful (? Uh? "Oh beautiful for spacious skies"), and Gilligans Island. Try it. lol.

"A three hour tourrrrrrrrrrr"

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Posted by wolleylabel on 03-11-2004 06:08 AM:

heh heh i like it

but is there kind of symbolism that the last quatrain's first line doesn't rhyme? perhaps to draw attention? or am i over analyzing?

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Posted by MellowYellow on 03-11-2004 07:21 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by wolleylabel
heh heh i like it

but is there kind of symbolism that the last quatrain's first line doesn't rhyme? perhaps to draw attention? or am i over analyzing?



ah shoot man i didn't even notice. I did the assignment in 30 minutes when i accidentally fell asleep .... again.

well i don't feel like fixing it now. It sounds good so.. yea. well fine it's just a poem... not in common meter. ^_^

I fixed it that way.

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